WARNING: This bowl of chickpea based crack is a divine intervention of a few simple ingredients that may well ruin your relationship with humus forever.
I was introduced to the recipe by a neighbour who I invited over for a mid-week dinner with her family. You know that dinner invite? The one where before the words have even finished leaving your mouth your inside voice is yelling ‘STOP TALKING, YOU DO NOT HAVE THE ENERGY’, but it’s too late, the plan is set and a whole extra family of noise, sticky toddler hands and chaos is trashing your living room all in the name of building the worlds largest fort… But then your lovely neighbour offers up an unassuming appy, ‘a quick little something she threw together’ – enter Chickpea smash – and “Holy sh*t, what sorcery is this?” Mind is well and truly blown, your chickpea life is changed forever.
It hits your taste buds like a bolt of lightening. Everyone, everything, fades into black and suddenly you’re floating on a magical fluffy cloud of flavour bliss. You feel the glow of a heavenly light, a choir of angles strikes up and accompanies bites 2, 3 then 4…
Ok, ok, you get the picture, it’s really bloody good.
Faff Factor: 1/5 * Flavour 5/5 * Fridge to Face: 10 mins
(Serves 4 as an appetizer)
1 can of chickpeas (1 1/2 cups of cooked from dried chickpeas)
1/4 cup red onion
big handful flat leafed parsley (approx 1/2 cup)
1/3 cup green pitted olives (Can substitute kalamata olives)
Zest & juice of 1/2 lemon
Big slug extra virgin olive oil
Salt & pepper
Sangak bread, toasted sourdough, baguette, pita, rice cakes, crackers, celery or carrot sticks
1. Drain & rinse the chickpeas, roughly chop the red onion and parsley and load all into a food processor (#1)
2. Pulse a few times until everything is just smashed (#2)
3. Add the green olives to the mix and pulse again until the olives are also smashed. You want the final mix to be choppy & chunky, not mush (#3 & #4)
4. Empty the smashed mix into a big mixing bowl. Add a decent slug of olive oil and the lemon zest. Fold through until combined. Add lemon juice, salt & pepper to taste. (I use Maldon salt flakes and fresh ground black pepper here)
5. Load onto any variety of dip carrying vessel and apply directly to face
6. Lock self in quiet room, away from small children with questions, and continue to apply to face. A solid G&T accompaniment wouldn’t be a horrible idea…
*If you don’t have a food processor, no worries. Just finely chop the onion, parsley and olives before adding to the chickpeas. Use a potato masher to smash everything into submission, then mix through the remaining ingredients.
**Highly recommend doubling this recipe. Keeps beautifully in the fridge for lunches, snacks and stolen moments, locked in the bathroom hiding from your family.
Easiest thing ever. Like, EVER.
Serving options: Cram a bunch of the smash mix into a 1/3 cup measure, then flip it over and bump it gently out onto a plate. Add another grind of black pepper and an extra drizzle of olive oil. (See below) Alternatively, just eat straight from the tub with a spoon while standing between open fridge doors.
I prefer this smash on the lemony side, but go slow and add the lemon juice bit by bit. Same with s&p.